The husband went to the GP and said he and his wife did not want any more children.
The GP told him there ws a procedure called a vasectomy that would ensure they had no more children but there was a long waiting list and it was expensive to jump the queues and "go private"
A cheaper alternative was to get a firework, light it,put it in an empty beer can then hold it up to either ear and count to 10.
The scouser said " I may not be the brightest person in the world but I really do not see how that will help me!"
"trust me it WILL do the job "said the GP.
So the scouser went home, lit a banger and put it in an empty beer can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count "1-2-3-4-5" at which point he gripped the can between his legs so he could continue counting with the other hand!!!
Please note this procedure works in all parts of Ireland as well as other parts of the UK!!
