Paraprosdokian:
Posted: 21 Dec 2011, 00:47
A figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase
is surprising or unexpected; frequently used in a humorous situation..
example of of paraprosdokian: 'Where there's a will, I want to be in it.’
* I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I
stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
* Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and
beat you with experience.
* The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.
* Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear
bright until you hear them speak.
* If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
* We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
* War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
* Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it
in a fruit salad.
* Evening news is where they begin with 'Good Evening,' and then
proceed to tell you why it isn't.
* A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station.
* I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.
* Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says, 'In
case of emergency, notify:' I put 'DOCTOR.'
* I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
* Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the
street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
* Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a
successful man is usually another woman.
* A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.
* You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute
to skydive twice.
* Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
* I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.
* You're never too old to learn something stupid.
* To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever
you hit the target.
* Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
* Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than
standing in a garage makes you a car.
* A diplomat is someone who tells you to go to hell in such a way
that you look forward to the trip.
* I always take life with a grain of salt. Plus a slice of lemon and
a shot of tequila.
* When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire
Department usually uses water.
Paraprosdokian:
A figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase
is surprising or unexpected; frequently used in a humorous situation..
example of of paraprosdokian: 'Where there's a will, I want to be in it.’
* I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I
stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
* Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and
beat you with experience.
* The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.
* Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear
bright until you hear them speak.
* If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
* We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
* War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
* Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it
in a fruit salad.
* Evening news is where they begin with 'Good Evening,' and then
proceed to tell you why it isn't.
* A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station.
* I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.
* Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says, 'In
case of emergency, notify:' I put 'DOCTOR.'
* I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
* Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the
street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
* Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a
successful man is usually another woman.
* A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.
* You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute
to skydive twice.
* Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
* I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.
* You're never too old to learn something stupid.
* To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever
you hit the target.
* Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
* Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than
standing in a garage makes you a car.
* A diplomat is someone who tells you to go to hell in such a way
that you look forward to the trip.
* I always take life with a grain of salt. Plus a slice of lemon and
a shot of tequila.
* When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire
Department usually uses water.
Paraprosdokian:
A figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase
is surprising or unexpected; frequently used in a humorous situation..
example of of paraprosdokian: 'Where there's a will, I want to be in it.’
* I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I
stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
* Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and
beat you with experience.
* The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.
* Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear
bright until you hear them speak.
* If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
* We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
* War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
* Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it
in a fruit salad.
* Evening news is where they begin with 'Good Evening,' and then
proceed to tell you why it isn't.
* A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station.
* I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.
* Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says, 'In
case of emergency, notify:' I put 'DOCTOR.'
* I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
* Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the
street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
* Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a
successful man is usually another woman.
* A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.
* You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute
to skydive twice.
* Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
* I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.
* You're never too old to learn something stupid.
* To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever
you hit the target.
* Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
* Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than
standing in a garage makes you a car.
* A diplomat is someone who tells you to go to hell in such a way
that you look forward to the trip.
* I always take life with a grain of salt. Plus a slice of lemon and
a shot of tequila.
* When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire
Department usually uses water.
Paraprosdokian:
A figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase
is surprising or unexpected; frequently used in a humorous situation..
example of of paraprosdokian: 'Where there's a will, I want to be in it.’
* I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I
stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
* Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and
beat you with experience.
* The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.
* Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear
bright until you hear them speak.
* If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
* We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
* War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
* Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it
in a fruit salad.
* Evening news is where they begin with 'Good Evening,' and then
proceed to tell you why it isn't.
* A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station.
* I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.
* Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says, 'In
case of emergency, notify:' I put 'DOCTOR.'
* I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
* Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the
street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
* Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a
successful man is usually another woman.
* A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.
* You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute
to skydive twice.
* Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
* I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.
* You're never too old to learn something stupid.
* To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever
you hit the target.
* Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
* Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than
standing in a garage makes you a car.
* A diplomat is someone who tells you to go to hell in such a way
that you look forward to the trip.
* I always take life with a grain of salt. Plus a slice of lemon and
a shot of tequila.
* When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire
Department usually uses water.
is surprising or unexpected; frequently used in a humorous situation..
example of of paraprosdokian: 'Where there's a will, I want to be in it.’
* I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I
stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
* Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and
beat you with experience.
* The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.
* Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear
bright until you hear them speak.
* If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
* We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
* War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
* Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it
in a fruit salad.
* Evening news is where they begin with 'Good Evening,' and then
proceed to tell you why it isn't.
* A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station.
* I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.
* Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says, 'In
case of emergency, notify:' I put 'DOCTOR.'
* I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
* Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the
street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
* Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a
successful man is usually another woman.
* A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.
* You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute
to skydive twice.
* Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
* I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.
* You're never too old to learn something stupid.
* To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever
you hit the target.
* Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
* Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than
standing in a garage makes you a car.
* A diplomat is someone who tells you to go to hell in such a way
that you look forward to the trip.
* I always take life with a grain of salt. Plus a slice of lemon and
a shot of tequila.
* When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire
Department usually uses water.
Paraprosdokian:
A figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase
is surprising or unexpected; frequently used in a humorous situation..
example of of paraprosdokian: 'Where there's a will, I want to be in it.’
* I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I
stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
* Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and
beat you with experience.
* The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.
* Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear
bright until you hear them speak.
* If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
* We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
* War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
* Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it
in a fruit salad.
* Evening news is where they begin with 'Good Evening,' and then
proceed to tell you why it isn't.
* A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station.
* I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.
* Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says, 'In
case of emergency, notify:' I put 'DOCTOR.'
* I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
* Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the
street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
* Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a
successful man is usually another woman.
* A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.
* You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute
to skydive twice.
* Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
* I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.
* You're never too old to learn something stupid.
* To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever
you hit the target.
* Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
* Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than
standing in a garage makes you a car.
* A diplomat is someone who tells you to go to hell in such a way
that you look forward to the trip.
* I always take life with a grain of salt. Plus a slice of lemon and
a shot of tequila.
* When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire
Department usually uses water.
Paraprosdokian:
A figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase
is surprising or unexpected; frequently used in a humorous situation..
example of of paraprosdokian: 'Where there's a will, I want to be in it.’
* I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I
stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
* Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and
beat you with experience.
* The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.
* Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear
bright until you hear them speak.
* If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
* We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
* War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
* Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it
in a fruit salad.
* Evening news is where they begin with 'Good Evening,' and then
proceed to tell you why it isn't.
* A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station.
* I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.
* Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says, 'In
case of emergency, notify:' I put 'DOCTOR.'
* I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
* Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the
street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
* Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a
successful man is usually another woman.
* A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.
* You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute
to skydive twice.
* Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
* I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.
* You're never too old to learn something stupid.
* To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever
you hit the target.
* Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
* Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than
standing in a garage makes you a car.
* A diplomat is someone who tells you to go to hell in such a way
that you look forward to the trip.
* I always take life with a grain of salt. Plus a slice of lemon and
a shot of tequila.
* When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire
Department usually uses water.
Paraprosdokian:
A figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase
is surprising or unexpected; frequently used in a humorous situation..
example of of paraprosdokian: 'Where there's a will, I want to be in it.’
* I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I
stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
* Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and
beat you with experience.
* The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.
* Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear
bright until you hear them speak.
* If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
* We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
* War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
* Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it
in a fruit salad.
* Evening news is where they begin with 'Good Evening,' and then
proceed to tell you why it isn't.
* A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station.
* I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.
* Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says, 'In
case of emergency, notify:' I put 'DOCTOR.'
* I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
* Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the
street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
* Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a
successful man is usually another woman.
* A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.
* You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute
to skydive twice.
* Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
* I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.
* You're never too old to learn something stupid.
* To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever
you hit the target.
* Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
* Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than
standing in a garage makes you a car.
* A diplomat is someone who tells you to go to hell in such a way
that you look forward to the trip.
* I always take life with a grain of salt. Plus a slice of lemon and
a shot of tequila.
* When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire
Department usually uses water.
