Genuine ebay advert

Flinty · Post by **Flinty** » 05 Jun 2008, 06:05

I came across this advert on ebay a couple of years ago and fell about laughing so much that I kept a copy of it. While going through some file on the pc this morning I came across it again.

I haven't printed the picture of the car (and the curled up kitten) but enjoy the advert!

Skoda Fovorite

Disintegrating rust heap for sale
Tax plus MOT until the end of this month, chances of passing upcoming MOT about the same as my chances of winning the National Lottery this weekend, comes with assortment of strange creaking noises, wobbly steering, duff radio, 'distressed' upholstery, snail infestation in boot (don't ask) and tyres that go flat if you look at them funny.
I think the exhaust is about to fall off too.

Would suit someone needing housing for chickens, demolition derby enthusiast, non-fussy homeless person, snail farmer who wants a head start.
Will swap for spare change, cat food.

Colour - Unattractive shade of turquoise with contrasting rust patches

Model - J Reg Skoda Favorit - lovingly crafted in the then newly liberated Eastern Europe by an unskilled peasant workforce and disgruntled ex-Volkswagen engineers.

Fuel - runs on pure four star, apparently this is now a mere quid a litre down in London. (at the time unleaded was about 77 pence)

Only 48,000 miles on the clock! It's been saying that since 1995, mind you.

Luxury features

Unfortunately the plastic VW badge on the front was long ago nicked by an undiscerning Beastie Boys fan. Why not replace it with a badge of your own? Perhaps one which indicates your political affiliation or your support for a charity or pressure group? Alternatively you could choose one with a witty slogan to amuse your fellow motorists. I suggest simply 'Porsche'.

The car has a sun roof. This doubles as a rain roof and means that you have all the fun of scraping frost from both the inside and the outside of your windshield in winter. Just try not to sit under the drip!

The spacious boot apparently provides an ideal snail breeding habitat. Starter colony is included.

Like many top rally cars, this vehicle starts with a satisfying throaty roar and clouds of blue smoke. Replacing the exhaust and possible the engine will probably correct this.

Features lucky corroded wheel rims.

Safety Features

Metal car body prevents 'fall-apart' (TM the Simpsons)
You'll be pretty damn lucky to get this car going anywhere near the national speed limit, let alone dangerously exceeding it.
For optimum safety, do not drive vehicle.

Sophisticated Anti-Theft Measures
Anti-theft doors emit ear-splitting creak when anyone tries to open them.
Unlikely to be stolen as no car thief in their right mind would let their mates see them driving around in this vehicle.

In-Car Entertainment

The radio hasn't worked since that little problem with the wiring back in 2002 which wrecked three perfectly good batteries in succession. Still, tons of entertainment can be gleaned from pressing the unresponsive buttons without having to listen to distracting music or announcers.
Or simply play the amusing 'guess why all the other cars are frantically flashing their lights at you this time' game.

Pictures below:
1. The car in all its glory. Don't all rush at once
2. Tragically, this kitten was born with a rubber spine. Buy my car and help feed the rubber-spined kitten! No, the rubber-spined kitten is not for sale.

:D

jackiem · Post by **jackiem** » 05 Jun 2008, 07:57

Brilliant. Did you notice whether it sold?

Diesel Kate · Post by **Diesel Kate** » 05 Jun 2008, 08:56

Brilliant. Did you notice whether it sold?

Thinking of buying it?

:D :D :D :D

Post by **CarolynM** » 05 Jun 2008, 08:56

... Well at least he is honest!! :D :D

janhind · Post by **janhind** » 05 Jun 2008, 09:43

And whats the betting that someone bought it, theres one born every minute.

jan xx

Glenys · Post by **Glenys** » 05 Jun 2008, 09:45

That sounds like some of the cars Ive had
:D

Do you remember" the wedding dress guy " on ebay it was the funniest thing ive seen this man was selling his ex wifes dress ive found a link as he is now quite famous not sure if there is a transcript of the ebay thing .

http://www.weddingdressguy.com/

Diesel Kate · Post by **Diesel Kate** » 05 Jun 2008, 10:32

Glenys. Just read the wedding dress one. I wonder if he ever sold it? He probably made more money on the talk shows.

:D :D :D

Glenys · Post by **Glenys** » 05 Jun 2008, 10:46

He did sell it for alot of money £7000 I think :D I remeber logging in every day to see what he wrote next it was trully hilarious.

Alison B · Post by **Alison B** » 05 Jun 2008, 11:34

It sounds like my Brother's first car!! :D

He bought it on a wet November night-so visibilty wasn't good

The next morning when he saw it in all it's glory (and we'd stopped laughing)

he swore it wasn't the same car he'd seen the night before

If you where out in it and it started raining-it would grind to a halt!

love Alison & Rosie (Lancs) XXX

jackiem · Post by **jackiem** » 05 Jun 2008, 11:41

Diesel Kate wrote:
Brilliant. Did you notice whether it sold?
Thinking of buying it?

:D :D :D :D

Just intrigued really. It sounds as though it was in a worst state than my poor little Morry 1000 when she "died". Little Boo was my first car and boy she had character! I had a wheel fall off (apparently my trunions went which sounds quite painful) when I was on the way to taking my two daughters to school. I rang the police to tell them that I was causing an obstruction and they came along and sat me in their car for warmth and safety until the RAC arrived. I then went through a spate of having to climb through the passenger door because the driver's door had fallen off. Evey time it rained, the windscreen washers fused and I had to carry a purseful of fuses everywhere with me just in case it rained. She finally had to go to the great carmaker in the sky when the suspension popped up through the floor when I was going round a roundabout. This car had had an MOT only seven weeks before! She was towed away and I shed a tear. I still look longingly at Morris 1000s when I see them just in case by some miracle someone decided to buy little Boo and renovate her.
Cars are just cars now. They don't have any character. I will concede though that they are probably more reliable!
Jackie

Flinty · Post by **Flinty** » 05 Jun 2008, 12:10

Yes it did sell ... the winning bid was £41.
:D

jackiem · Post by **jackiem** » 05 Jun 2008, 12:42

Flinty wrote:Yes it did sell ... the winning bid was £41.
:D

It was clearly in a worse state than my Boo then because I got £50 for her!
Jackie